And My Darling Said, Farewell
by Kiryn
Summary: He cannot remember. All he sees is her; a flash of white fluttering out of sight.


**A/N: So. This is pretty short for my oneshot standards, as usually they seem to range around 2000 words or so, but after reading this over, I discovered that I liked what was there, and I don't feel like there's much to add. Which is probably why the inspiration that had seized a hold of me to write this stopped and left when it did. Anyway. So this story. Well. Inspiration grabbed a hold of me, out of nowhere while I was in the school library back in February, trying to do my ever-present homework, and…well. This is…perhaps the closest I will ever come to writing a Roxas/Naminé fic. You can tell, because I really don't think this pairing is romantic at all, nor will you see it depicted as such below. So don't expect it from me, ever. Also, if you pay attention, you should be able to see a hint of which sails my wind blows into, or you may not. This isn't supposed to really be a pairing-centric fic anyway. All that said, I hope you review! Even perhaps the disappointed RokuNami shippers? I swear there's no blatant yaoi/slash here. **

**The eventual companion piece to this story will be entitled **_**Goodnight, My Darling Said**_**.**

**Warnings: Amazingly, there's no swearing, or much of anything to report here. Takes place in Virtual Twilight Town, though, if you needed a clue of the potential angst factor within.**

**Random Note About Kiryn's Life That You Probably Don't Care About, But May Spark An Interesting Correspondence With Her, Who Knows: I'm playing Crisis Core (FFVII prequel) right now, and Nibelheim is totally wigging me out. Not quite as many chills as Castle Oblivion gave me in Re:coded, but still, good God. This is me: "Sephiroth, you know, I really think we should just get the hell out of Dodge, like, **_**right now**_**. Just saying. I mean, I totally love you, really, especially, you know, when you're a good guy, because you're truly awesome, but…um…Very Soon Now, you're going to start scaring the shit out of me, and I'd really like to leave? **_**Please**_**?" **

**Disclaimer: Well, obviously I don't own Kingdom Hearts. If I did, why would I sit here writing fanfiction for it? Sorry people, the series (sadly) belongs to Square Enix and Disney. The inspiration for this title, and for its companion piece, is the song "Hello Fascination" by Breathe Carolina, which I totally think is Sora and Naminé's theme in Castle Oblivion. Look it up. You know it's true. **

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><p><span>And My Darling Said, Farewell<span>

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><p>There's something missing, he knows. Something important. So very, very important. But he has no idea what. All he sees is her.<p>

She's blonde and waifish, with blue eyes that look as if they've only seen the saddest things in the world. She's always alone, and he thinks she's friendless. Her dress is white, her skin is white, and even her blonde hair is almost white. She's colorless, and she's always fading away.

He knows that he doesn't know her, that he has never met her. He doesn't even know if she's real, or if she is some strange, pale specter, although he hardly knew what reason she could possibly be haunting him for. And that's exactly what she was doing. Haunting.

All he knows was that she was just _there_ one day, in his dreams, and now she lingers on the edges of his consciousness. In the waking world, she is a glimpse here and there, a flash of white fluttering out of sight. But in his dreams, he can see her fully, see her lips tilt up to mirror the sadness in her eyes as she smiles at him.

It's always apologetic, that smile.

No, I can't tell you who I am.

No, I can't tell you if this is real or some hallucinatory delusion.

No, I can't let you remember.

She is the roadblock, the wall he keeps banging up against. His mind searches, gropes for the important things, the reasons that he _knows_, _he knows_ why there is a strange, terrible hollow feeling inside his chest, and there's a clue that's so simple and obvious, but it eludes him. He _once knew_ what it was he was missing, why apart from the dreams he has of The Boy (_Sora, his name is Sora_) he dreams of tangled rushes and messes of indistinct, blurry images. When he has these dreams, he knows he's close, close to knowing, to _remembering_—

But then _she_ is there, sad smile and sad eyes, and she takes the memories before he can reach them, she takes the important things and cups them into her hands, shielding them from his sight. And he wonders if he is crazy, and if she is some kind of mental construct, a personification he has given to a simple mental block, trauma-induced amnesia. Is she an angel, a guardian angel, meant to shield a fragile mind from painful memories?

Awake, and surrounded by the bright chatter of Hayner, Pence, and Olette, Roxas scoffs; this notion is ridiculous. He's lived in Twilight Town all of his life; what trauma could he have possibly endured in safe, sleepy Twilight Town?

At night though, he dreams of The Boy and beaches and green eyes, and Roxas wants to scream.

Who is Sora? Who are that boy and that girl, who are those talking animals, what are those creatures, what are those things (_keyblades_), and _who_ is that pick-apart memory? Filled with gaping holes, pieces distressingly missing—

And she smiles at him, always melancholy, pockets of secrets and hands of memories, dipping behind her back and out of sight. But it doesn't matter, because he knows they're there, but she's impenetrable as always, hardly real, hardly existing.

Sadness eclipses her features a little more each time he sees her. He wonders if she's ever laughed, or smiled a happy smile.

_Roxas. You can't keep fighting me_. Her voice is a whisper, and yet it echoes, clanging like a silver bell in his mind. _You're only making this harder. _

What he wants to know is why no one, ever, can just tell him the truth…

—_not true!—_

—_I_—

She shakes her head, blonde strands of hair brushed just to the side of teardrop-blue colored eyes. _Not yet, Roxas. Just be patient. Only five days left._

Of summer vacation…Yes, he knows that…doesn't he?

Roxas doesn't know. Roxas can't remember anything, anymore.

_She_ is all that's left.


End file.
